A Thousand Pretty Words
-
The sun came down
The night pours out like mercury
From a broken thermometer
Or like a little maze toy
I had when I was young
So many years ago that
I recall it as I would
an old episode of a terrible sitcom.To be friend of the
Burdens and weariness
Which have followed
On the coat tails of
Adulthood
But not at the price
Of Peter Pan. -
Excerpts From My Brother’s Diary
August 2nd, 2005.
I’m reminded of winter break when I couldn’t wait to get back to school. Only this time I’m content where I am, I like it. I like my life. I’m just also excited for the rest of my life. I’m finally happy.
Maybe it’s just all the Vitamin B talking.
11:30 or so.
-
“An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.” — Goi Nasu (via pyur)(via nothingbutblueskys)
-
I stare at the vast ocean at night.
“I’m scared.” He whispered.
I wondered why I wasn’t.
I was mesmerized.
I don’t mean to be morbid, but am I afraid to die?I think that I’m not,
But that he must be.
I wonder how that feels.
I don’t remember the fear of death,
But I recall the longing for it.I’ve since overcome the inclination
To jump or cut or veer off the road.
But I wonder what it’s like to never know that at all.I stare at the vast ocean at night.
“I’m scared.” He whispered.
“I wish that I was.” -
Nothing about life is as permanent as I’d like it to be.
-
Forgive Me For The Last Line
I don’t need to get blackout drunk anymore, I think.
I don’t need to sit in cars full of “friends” and act as if we’re going to “care” about each other forever anymore, I think.
I’ve exhausted myself of explaining humans to other humans who are incapable of comprehending another kind, I believe.
I’ve exhausted myself of pretending my own flesh and blood is an upright, A-OK human being, because he isn’t, I believe.
I’ve grown weary of bitching.
I’ve absolutely become adverse to the idea of pretending anything to be quite frank.
And so to return to my home will be to accept all these things again.
What is one to do when she’s not a girl but not yet a woman?
-
“ My life is not all peaches and roses. But I write this whole story and highlight the ups, not the downs, because I do not believe in coincidences. I do not believe in luck. I believe in an active Creator. I have experienced too much in my life to lead me to think this is all atoms and physics and chemistry and coincidence. I have experienced pain and misfortune and sadness, but as much as those things too define me it is the joys of life I dwell on.
There is a man upstairs. He has a plan. And while I do not know the mind of the Creator, I know this all works for the good of those who are called according to His purpose. I do not know His plan, but I have experienced enough in my life to know I should trust Him and that His plan, however confounding it may seem, is a good plan that will work out in the end for the best.
”— Erick Erickson -
Tears don’t mean you’re losing, everybody’s bruising. It’s okay not to be okay.
Words I need to hear.
Words roomie needs to hear.
I just love her a whole lot and I wish I could fix her hurt.
-
I just want my roommate back.
I’m sad and I want to go back in time.
I need her for more reasons than I can verbalize.
I need my other 2 as well.
They aren’t answering me and I’m feeling alone and I don’t know what to do.
I don’t know what to do. -
You did it.
I hope you don’t have those cuts and scars forever.
You did it and I don’t know how to respond.
I keep thinking about me when I should be thinking about you.
Why are you so sad?
Why can’t I help you?
